Success, fuel for the fire

Ok so far with my young Z I have been two things at trials.  First successful and the second thing is consistent.  This has been a blessing and a curse.  Ok I know some of you say "Heck dude I'm struggling where I'm at and here you are whining about being successful and consistent.  Dude some people work there whole lives for an ounce of that."

Ok I'll back the truck up and say I am really grateful and excited by both aspects.  I mean really the pup is just two and it can only get better from here right?  Right!  I have been working a long time toward this and my hard work and dedication is paying off exponentially.

But now I have to figure out how to deal with the success and what it means to me.  After reflecting on the videos of my runs I was thrilled with my dog, but I really need to look at myself.  I'm not really excited about the person at the post.  I should have helped my dog more, especially in the Pro Nov run.  I should have helped Z  first off get to the right place on the out run.  But no I was busy trying to save points, so I yelled and really didn't help my dog as much as I should have.  I was busy being competitive when I really should have been doing a little more training.

 In my training I have been working towards being more quiet and whistling almost exclusively.  It was going great until today.  He ran like a train, pretty much right through the bit.  I let him and myself down and raised my voice quite a bit.  I know that sometimes a raised voice and a well time correction is just what the training ordered, but I don't want to slip back and rely on it.  I don't want to sound like a shrew out there working my dog.  And all my stupid head could think about is the next competition instead of what is good for the dog's progress right now.  I'm having trouble keeping my head together because of my stupid ego.

Good news is I didn't break the dog.  He didn't pout, and I found the square flanks he's been hiding.  I sort of found the brakes too.  Sunday is my next training session and I will have a whole week to meditate on keeping things quiet and calm in training at least.

Save me from myself :)